“Tinder Baby: A child birthed from the act of sexual intercourse between two people who met each other through the popular dating app, Tinder.”
Urban Dictionary
When the dating app Tinder launched in 2012, it made choosing a date for the night a simple ‘swipe right’. Millions of people downloaded the app looking for love, romance, a new soul mate - or a casual fling.
However. what many probably considered a ‘casual fling’ at the time had led to legal obligations not envisaged, when ‘no strings’ turns into ‘new baby’. Within weeks of meeting a new partner via the app, some women were making that difficult phone call to a person they barely knew to say, “I’m pregnant”. For parents of a Tinder baby or indeed an unexpected lockdown baby, it marks the start of longstanding ties between them.
New parents, new responsibilities
As a family lawyer, I see first-hand the ramifications of unplanned, unexpected and unwanted pregnancies as a result of casual liaisons. There are major legal issues that need discussing and resolving, including:
• Parental responsibility
• Confirming paternity (or not)
• The legal rights of the father
• Living arrangements / child arrangements
• Financial responsibility and child maintenance
When clients first contact us, my first piece of advice is to act now, and do not wait until the baby is born. The sooner parental rights can be established, then action can be taken to protect the welfare of the child.
Legal rights and parental responsibility
Many clients do not realise that as parents, they have both specific legal rights AND a duty of ‘parental responsibility’ to look after their child. Fathers are often less informed about their rights, and need to understand:
• Mothers automatically have parental responsibility.
• A father has parental responsibility if he is married to the child’s mother, or is named on the birth certificate.
• Unmarried fathers do NOT have automatic parental responsibility.
However, what many fathers fail to grasp is that the responsibility to financially maintain a child and pay child maintenance will still apply - whether they like it or not. As we all know as lawyers, saying that the Tinder date and subsequent sexual encounter was “just a bit of fun with no strings attached” won’t stand up in court.
Disputing paternity
A paternity test compares the DNA of a parent and a child, to see if they are related. Paternity tests provide independent scientific proof that can be used when applying for child contact and resolving disputes about child maintenance. However, we always advise clients to query paternity wisely. If paternity is questioned and a test comes back positive, it could permanently affect the father’s relationship with the mother.
Fathers and unborn babies
Another point new fathers may not appreciate is that a father has no rights towards an unborn child. They have no rights to:
• Contact the mother
• Make any decisions regarding the pregnancy
The child’s mother does not need the father’s consent to receive medical treatment, travel abroad, or end her pregnancy.
The father, however, needs the consent of the mother to:
• Access medical records concerning the pregnancy
• Attend a medical appointment alongside the mother
• Be present for baby scans
• Be present at the birth
• Get notified of the birth
• Visit the mother and baby in a hospital after birth
Shared parental responsibility
Shared parental responsibility does not give the non-resident parent an automatic right to child contact. This can lead to tensions between parents who want to live apart and lead separate lives, but take major decisions together regarding schooling, health, and where the child will live. This is where are family lawyers we can help separated parents draw up Child Arrangement agreements, or apply for a Specific Issue Order or Prohibited Steps Order to let the court decide what’s best for the child.
Family law with a human touch
Our approach to any paternity or maternity issues are to take a child-centred approach and create a bespoke solution that works for both parents too. After all, as The Telegraph Australia said in an article: ““While technology makes it easy to ditch an unsuitable date and move on, it’s not quite so easy to swipe away a baby.”